Networking for Introverts: 8 Tips to Help You Connect
Introverts get a bad rap. Coincidentally, so does networking. In this post, we’re going to set aside all the preconceived notions about introverts and networking and show you how to navigate networking events, foster genuine relationships, and advance your career prospects without feeling overstimulated or exhausted.
Characteristics of introverts
‘Introvert’ is a term used to describe a personality type with certain characteristics. You might be an introvert if you…
Recharge by being alone
Contrary to popular belief, being introverted isn’t about being shy. In fact, many introverts aren’t shy at all. Instead, introversion (and its opposite, extroversion) is defined based on how people with this personality type derive their energy. Introverts find sustained periods of social interaction draining and recharge by focusing inward. After going to a party, for example, an introvert may need time to be alone with their thoughts to feel re-energized. Extroverts, on the other hand, feel energized by spending time with others.
Prefer solitary or small group activities over crowds
Introverts find it easier to connect with others one-on-one and typically enjoy small gatherings over large events. This also translates into work style, with introverts preferring solo assignments or partnerships rather than working on group projects.
Dislike small talk
Chatter about innocuous topics like the weather seems frivolous to many introverts. They’d rather discuss deeper topics, from politics to personal issues. Introverts are strong listeners and enjoy hearing, processing, and responding to information, so in-depth conversations suit them better than the rapid-fire, back-and-forth nature of small talk.
Have a few close friendships instead of many acquaintances
Introverts can often count their close friends on one hand. That doesn’t mean they’re unfriendly; it just means they’re particular about how they spend their social time and who they spend it with. They may enjoy meeting new people but prefer deep and long-lasting friendships over more superficial connections with numerous acquaintances.
Are inwardly reflective
Introverts are great at self-reflection and possess strong self-awareness. They’re highly in touch with their own thoughts and feelings and enjoy learning more about what motivates them and makes them tick.
Misconceptions about introverts
There are a lot of misconceptions about introverts out there. It’s a mistake to think all introverts…
Are shy
Shyness is primarily characterized by feeling self-conscious and inhibited around others. A shy person may want to interact at a party but feel too nervous to, and an introvert would be perfectly content to sit quietly at a side table during the party or not to attend it at all. Introverts can be confident and even outgoing, but alone time is a must afterward.
Dislike talking to people
In fact, quite the opposite is true. Introverts can find deep fulfillment in engaging conversations, particularly when they have a chance to discuss an interesting topic with one or two other people.
Are not good at networking
While introverts may be averse to the cliche networking event (handing out business cards at a loud event hall filled with people), they can be networking superstars in other ways. Introverts’ innate listening skills and ability to form meaningful connections can lead to enduring, rewarding professional relationships.
Networking advice for introverts
Don’t assume that being an introvert means networking isn’t for you. In many ways, introversion and networking can coexist and even be more productive than networking in the traditional sense. Follow these tips to build your network as an introvert.
1. Embrace your introversion
Many introverts get frustrated with networking because they feel like they’re supposed to pretend to be extroverts. This isn’t necessary and, in fact, is counterproductive because it will leave them feeling even more drained.
Instead of forcing yourself to be something you’re not, learn how to use your introversion to your advantage. Rather than milling through the crowd at a big event, hang back along the edges where it’s quieter and strike up a conversation with someone else who’s also on the sidelines (perhaps another introvert who will welcome the introduction). When others approach you, ask a thoughtful question, sit back, and put your listening skills to work as they answer.
2. Set comfortable boundaries
Remove the feeling of dread from networking by doing it on your own terms. Choose events carefully, weighing the value you’ll get from them against other priorities, like the work you could catch up on if you skipped out.
For events you do decide to attend, give yourself an achievable goal, like staying for 30 minutes or talking to two people. Once you’ve met your goal, you can leave without feeling guilty.
3. Think about it
As we mentioned earlier, introverts are natural thinkers. Harness your propensity to ponder by turning your attention toward a networking event that’s coming up in your future. Think about the goals you set, the type of people you’d like to talk to, the topics you might discuss, and the elevator pitch you’ll give if someone asks you about yourself. Doing some advanced mental reflection can make the event feel like less of a burden and more of a challenge that you’re prepared to take on.
4. Pace yourself
Since introverts need time alone to recharge after social situations, it’s a great strategy to build that time into your schedule intentionally. If you have an event coming up where you know you’ll be talking to people for hours, try to keep the following day free of meetings, so you have that necessary time to bounce back.
Related: How to Write a Thank You Email After a Networking Event
5. Gather intel in advance
Extroverts may have no problem showing up to an event on a moment’s notice and winging it. On the other hand, introverts will feel much more at ease with a bit of preparation.
Before you go into a networking situation, read up on the event, the speaker, the organization that’s hosting it, or any other topic that will make it easier for you to initiate and sustain conversations. You can conserve energy at the event by having these talking points in your back pocket and pulling them out if you need a conversation starter or you hit a lull during a chat.
6. Network in alternative ways
Unfortunately, the word ‘networking’ brings to mind some negative stereotypes–namely, schmoozy interactions in crowded settings where everyone is looking to advance their own interests. Sure, there are some networking events that feel this way, but networking doesn’t have to equal crowds or superficial interactions.
Introverts can network very effectively in the settings where they feel most at home: one-on-one and in small groups. Here are a few ideas to branch out while putting less of a strain on your social battery:
- Participate in groups for your industry on LinkedIn
- Take part in virtual networking events that require less of a commitment
- Attend local meetups for your interests and hobbies
- Host a dinner party and invite a handful of people you’d like to get to know better
- Volunteer
If you’re going to a big, crowded event, prioritize being there at the times that are more suitable to low-key interactions, like when the breakfast table opens first thing in the morning or during niche breakout sessions with smaller audiences.
7. Make your network do the networking
There are people in your professional circle who were born to network: extroverts. Enlist them to help you do the part you dislike by asking who they know that you should meet. When someone you already know makes an introduction for you, it eliminates a lot of the perfunctory chatter that introverts find tiresome and allows you to converse on a deeper level more quickly.
8. Deepen existing connections
We know introverts value profound friendships over surface-level connections, but those deep friendships have to start somewhere. Expand your network by growing closer to lesser-known acquaintances. Reconnecting with that coworker you wish you’d stayed in touch with or setting up coffee with an interesting colleague in your field can yield the type of engaging conversation introverts crave without feeling at all like networking.
By tailoring your approach to your strengths and setting reasonable limits, you can be a great networker and an introvert at the same time. It takes practice to find the strategy and situations that work best for you. Keep at it, and over time, you’ll build a network of connections that are not only professionally beneficial but meaningful, as well.
Related: Step-by-Step Guide on How to Network
